What does it mean to be open? Well, first I want to meander back to the idea of consciousness again. Essentially, the simplest way to think about consciousness in a more concrete way is to think about being unconscious or “knocked out”. When a boxer knocks out another boxer, they become unconscious. Essentially, not awake or aware. Sometimes we get KO’d by life. Sometimes we do it to ourselves. Why?

Well, it’s a defense mechanism really. Isn’t it? We shut down to protect ourselves, put up barriers, close off. You can live a life like that, whether it’s brought on by the heartaches and struggles out of your control or by your own hand in avoidance of future pain. But that isn’t a really good life. When we are closed off, unconscious, and unaware we are not living our BEST life.

I’m not saying that we don’t need a shutdown sometimes. Of course, we do, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. In those moments, to pause and cope, heal, replenish, and prepare is healthy. When we are ready, we can decide when the time is right to move forward gently again.

As humans, we are pre-programmed to instinctively know when it is safe to do so and to be open again. Whether we do it or not depends on whether we are conscious or unconscious about that instinct. In the healing process, if we have found a way to open back up gradually there is a good chance we will become more aware of ourselves as we do and eventually become more conscious and open.

Now, how do we stay open? It becomes a daily practice. Did I say it was easy? No. Is it worth it? Yes. Openness and vulnerability actually provide a hidden strength to our survival. We use openness to re-establish trust in our lives, we become open to owning and accepting our mistakes and the mistakes of others. We work towards being open to the ideas of forgiveness, and ultimately we develop the ability to be open to love and be loved.

If you are interested, author David Deida talks to both men and women about how to be open in love in relationships.

We heal and make more space for love inside. Life may still present challenges to that openness. And when it does, we may find ourselves pausing again before we can go gently back toward the open door of awareness.

Take time and breath through it…. It’s worth it.

Christina

You can watch the accompanying video on YouTube by clicking here:

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